The Notebooks of Lazarus Long

Any priest or shaman must be presumed guilty until proved innocent.
Always listen to experts. They'll tell you what can't be done, and why. Then do it.
Get a shot off fast. This upsets him long enough to let you make your second shot perfect.
If it can't be expressed in figures, it is not science, it is opinion.
It has long been known that one horse can run faster than another–but which one? Differences are crucial.
Certainly the game is rigged. Don't let that stop you; if you don't bet you can't win.
If you don't like yourself, you can't like other people.
Your enemy is never a villain in his own eye. Keep this in mind, it may offer a way to make him your friend. If not, you can kill him without hate–and quickly.
Of all the strange “crimes” that human beings have legislated out of nothing, “blasphemy” is the most amazing–with “obscenity” and “indecent exposure” fighting it out for second and third place.
There is no conclusive evidence of life after death. But there is no evidence of any sort against it. Soon enough you will know–so why fret about it?
Cheops' Law: Nothing ever gets built on schedule or within budget.
It is better to copulate than never.
All men are created unequal.
Money is a powerful aphrodisiac. But flowers work almost as well.
Delusions are often functional. A mother's opinions about her children's beauty, intelligence, goodness et cetera ad nauseam, keep her from drowning them at birth.
One man's theology is another man's belly laugh.
Sex should be friendly. Otherwise stick to mechanical toys, it's more sanitary.
Men rarely (if ever) manage to dream up a god superior to themselves. Most gods have the manners and morals of a spoiled child.
Avoid making irrevocable decisions while tired or hungry. N.B.: Circumstances can force your hand. So think ahead!
A generation which ignores history has no past and no future.
Place your clothes and weapons where you can find them in the dark.